getting Stonger

I remembered the first time I bravely tried to ride on a roller coaster... it was totaly a breath taking. But since I play the tough & no fear boyish girl in our peer I decided to sit on the first trunk of the roller coaster train. I am pretty sure back then that it was something beyond what i have tried in my life. As the engine starts, I was AFRAID, NERVOUS and EXCITED. I was shouting the whole time, I even shouted to death when the train stopped. It was a long waited three minute ride, but it was the best three minute of my life when I was in high school. I love adrenaline & adventure.

But a roller coaster ride at enchanted is far more different from a roller coaster ride when it comes to real life circumstances. Whenever I am asked to describe myself I only say one thing, "I am Strong" UNTIL I was tested. I felt that Ive been lying to everyone, Ive been lying to myself. I felt very weak & helpless. My family was misunderstanding each other. My studies was a failure. I am stressed like hell.

I dont want the picture of me crying. I hate crying. I dont want other people see me crying. I even questioned God why is He doing this to His believers. All of these hardships came at once, at a time I was building a close relationship with Him. But God made me realized three important lesson. First crying is not a sin. Second, there are people who loves me so much that I dont even noticed. And third is that He is in CONTROL of everything, I dont have to do anything but to have FAITH and BELIEVE because His thoughts are PERFECT.

And now I consider myself getting STRONGER. <3